Conversations Regarding a Gallbladder Surgery – A True Story

Surgeon: You have a stone of three centimeters in your gallbladder.

Me: The size of a golf ball? Well, I’ve always been an overachiever.

Me: How are you going to get a golf ball through my belly button? You’ll disfigure me!

Surgeon: I’ll have to crush the stone to make it fit.

Me: Crush it? But my friends want to see it. One of them calls it my ‘pearl’.

Surgeon: They don’t allow people to take the stones home anymore.

Me: Well, that’s a shame. I was thinking of making mine into a pendant.

Me: So are you a general surgeon?

Surgeon: Yes.

Me: Like Meredith Grey?

Surgeon: I’ve heard of her. She’s on some show?

Me: Yeah, she’s a rock star surgeon.

Surgeon: I bet she does more than fix hernias and remove gallbladders.

Me: Yeah, once she removed something from a guy that turned out to be his twin. He had absorbed it while they were in the womb. It was really gross.

Continue reading